


Killing Me Softly With Her Song

by Mariette_Prince



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Revelations, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:55:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25006537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mariette_Prince/pseuds/Mariette_Prince
Summary: Professor John Smith accidentally heard singing of Clara Oswald - his student he is secretly in love with. Will Perry Como's song help him figure out his feelings? Is it as unrequited love as he thinks?
Relationships: Twelfth Doctor & Clara Oswin Oswald, Twelfth Doctor/Clara Oswin Oswald
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Killing Me Softly With Her Song

**Author's Note:**

> My English is still bad but I tried. The work was already published in Russian: https://ficbook.net/readfic/5017879
> 
> Song: Perry Como - Killing Me Softly With Her Song

She was sitting on the windowsill and slowly strumming someone’s guitar tuned a half, when he saw her. Brown curls like chocolate waves fell down on her shoulders, covering her face. Her fingers moved masterly. The melody she played seemed surprisingly familiar to him. What was it? He couldn’t remember.

There were some freshmen around her (he forgot their faces and names) asking her to play anything else. She smiled and nodded.

“No, guys, today I’m a little bit summertime sadness,” she joked and continued to play the same tune.

“Then sing at least,” said ginger girl next to her. “You know the lyrics.”

“ Well you’ll regret about it,” Clara grinned.

She settled herself comfortably on the windowsill, pulled up her guitar and started again. A short loss… Pause. She opened her lips.

_I heard she sang a good song, I heard she had a style.  
And so I came to see her and listen for a while._

It seemed to him that he had already heard her singing. But in fact he hadn’t. Professor John Smith – the Doctor for every student here – became an accidental listener, frozen on the last rung, not daring to break this absolute magic endowed with hidden meaning.

_And there she was this young girl, a stranger to my eyes._

_Strumming my pain with her fingers,  
singing my life with her words,  
killing me softly with her song,_

She couldn’t notice him but he could clearly see her face. The way her smile changed. The moment she raised her eyes filled with sincere tenderness. Her voice wasn’t too girlish. It was deep, velvet with astringency and spice notes. She did not need to take high notes. Her singing was like a river flow, calm and measured, in charmed forest where no one would’t dare to disturb natural beauty.

_I felt all flushed with fever, embarrassed by the crowd,  
I felt she found my letters and read each one out loud.  
I prayed that she would finish but she just kept right on._

The Doctor swallowed nervously. What if she notice him? That would be extremely embarrassing - he froze half a step, moderating his breathing and catching every sound. Wouldn't he seem funny to her? He couldn’t appear like this. His stupid face would show the way he felt. So he shouldn’t… Never! The Doctor didn’t dare to say out loud. How will she react when she finds out that her professor is in love with her? She’ll probably laugh and give him a condescending smile.

_She sang as if he knew me in all my dark despair_  
and then she looked right through me as if I wasn't there.  
But she just came to singing, singing clear and strong. 

He didn’t notice taking a few steps forward and leaving his zone of inaccessibility. Too close. He was already thinking of slipping quietly to another floor but the look of the darkened brown eyes trapped him. Clara glanced at him and shortly smiled at the corners of her lips, continuing her song. He thought for a moment that she wasn’t looking at him but somewhere in the distance. There was no longer any reason to hide.

Students standing nearby noticed right away when professor of poetry John Smith stepped onto the floor. But Сlara unlike them didn’t even give a look at him. She finished last chorus fingering the final chord.

“Did you like it?” she asked and looked at him curiously.

He wasn’t ready with an answer.

“Uh…yes,” the Doctor squeezed out. “You have a beautiful voice.”

“Ordinary,” Clara answered indifferently but smiled.

She got up from the windowsill and handed the guitar to ginger girl.

“Thank you, that’s all torment for now.”

Then all three students began to gather slowly. The Doctor suddenly realized that he hadn’t said anything. He wanted to stay with her a little bit longer.

“”Ms Oswald, may I have a word with you?” he called delicately to her when the girl fastened her bag.

Clara turned to him and nodded.

“Maybe in the attic...”

The Doctor didn’t have to finish because the Clara went to the attic as if she already knew the place. They entered it and the he closed the door behind him. When the Doctor turned around Clara was already climbing the stairs. He felt his heart in the throat.

“Did you truly liked it?” she asked with a bit of disbelief when he finally got close.

“I did. Absolutely true,” the Doctor assured with full confidence. “How could I didn’t like it? Charming song, charming voice as you are…”

He grasped the meaning of his words when he almost finished. With a slight startle professor Smith glanced at Clara. She smiled a little wider than before pressing her lower lip with white teeth.

“You flatter me,” she said. “But, to be honest, I like it.”

“I’m not…” there were some disappointment in his tone. “I really liked it. And the song… Amazing lyrics. I’d like to write with the same depth.”

After these words Clara immediately turned to him as if she was terribly angry at such a remark.

“You have amazing poems much more deeper than these ones,” she retorted. “It’s just a song with a nice storyline and melodious music. _Your _poems have much more virtues.”__

__“Too good to be true,” the Doctor chuckled. “And what did you like?”_ _

__Now she was embarrassed with his question._ _

__“ _I can’t forget the time you sorrow,/ Your love costs more than all my days. / Your soul is proud – I cannot borrow/ Such lucky ticket in the way./ I cherish every smile you giving/ To me. I love the sounds of your speak./ But I can’t stay, I need the leaving/ Before the passion come to pique,_ ” - Clara finally admitted and somehow turned away. “This... it seems... as if it was about me.”_ _

__Frightened by her words she hurriedly added “I mean I feel this way.”_ _

__The Doctor hardly knew what he should answer her._ _

__“I’m glad that we…uhm… have the same ideas about unrequired love, ” he tried to find the best words very carefully. “After all, this is a rather complicated topic in poetry.”_ _

__“It isn’t easier in real life,” Clara seriously added. “Though… it depends on the way of looking.”_ _

__“And what way do _you_ prefer?” the Doctor asked ironically, wondering once again at her frank impulse._ _

__Her gaze took off from the floor again and rushed somewhere dreamily forward. She smiled with her charming lips as always._ _

__“Philosophically,” she shrugged. “Loving is good. It is some sort of miracle. Mutual or undivided - it remains love. Unrequited feelings are more poetic. I suppose you couldn’t write a good poem when you’re happy. Suffering makes inspiration, doesn't it?”_ _

__The Doctor nodded but she didn’t need his approval._ _

__“You can’t regret about your feelings, no,” Clara continued. “Even without any hope.”_ _

__“What should you do then?”_ _

__Her smile seemed half painful to him._ _

__“Recognize its right to exist,” she said. “Or confess…”_ _

__The Doctor looked at her with genuine admiration._ _

__“What if you are sure about the refusion in return?” he was surprised._ _

__“So what?” Clara turned to him eyebrows mockingly. “You’ll be sure and it is good. No false hopes. No illusions.”_ _

__She drew the tip of her tongue around the outline of her upper lip and added just as easily, “As if I would tell you that I love you. You would have laugh and patronizing listed me a thousand and one reason why it is silly and impossible.”_ _

__Something collapsed in his soul, causing all the dust to rise into the air. Is it purely hypothetical?_ _

__“I wouldn’t say that,” the Doctor said quite seriously, not taking his eyes off Clara. “And he certainly didn’t laugh.”_ _

__A smile slid from her lips._ _

__“And what would you answer?” she asked._ _

__“That I could hardly say it first,” he said barely audible looking over her features._ _

__“Then I shouldn’t be afraid, should I?” she whispered as the Doctor was already leaning toward her._ _

__He touched her neck with his lips and a quiet half-exhale became an approving signal for him. Slowly he savored every inch of her pale skin. The road to the lips stretched into an infinity of pleasure._ _

__Their kiss came out gentle and barely timid. The Doctor was careful in every way with difficulty realizing what had just happened. His palm covered her cheek and with the other hand he pulled her closer. Clara allowed him more and more. Slow long kisses became hotter and more passionate, fueled by unburned emotions and desires._ _

__The Doctor couldn’t immediately broke away from sugar lips but couldn’t resist the temptation to taste her pale skin again. He left kisses on her neck, chest and shoulders enjoying every moment. She clung tightly to him trustingly arching towards his lips and catching her own hot air._ _

__Breathing heavily he rested his hands in the windowsill and closed his eyes inhaled the scent of the girls' hair._ _

__“Perhaps the mutual feeling is not so inferior to the unrequited,” the Doctor whispered in the her ear and gently kissed her temple._ _

__“Not in poetry,” Clara answered and snuggled closer to him. “But for human relations, definitely yes.”_ _


End file.
